Today I spent 30 minutes on a planning phone call with 3 senior women who’ll serve as panelists at a session about negotiation I’m conducting next month.  The session is for other women in their company; these folks have been invited to share their experiences. 

I was struck by how important it was to these women to talk about things that would be helpful to the audience and how seriously they took their responsibility.  I was equally impressed at how supportive they were of one another.  As a result, I’m pretty confident that the group we’ll be working with will find the panel discussion helpful.

On a personal note, I find myself looking forward to learning more about these women and their company because too often I don’t get that same sense of collaboration among women who have risen through the ranks in Corporate America.  Do you think that is because way too often they were the only women in the room?  In any case, when it happens, it’s magic.

TAGS: panels, support, Women at Work

Political campaigns provide plenty of fodder for learning about the “look and sound” of success or leadership.  A defining moment that illuminates this, for those of us old enough to remember, was the Kennedy-Nixon debates of 1960.  Those watching on television thought Kennedy won the debate — he looked more like a leader than Nixon.  Those listening on the radio gave Nixon the nod — they thought he sounded more like a leader.  One of the things the Clinton campaign struggles with and continues tweaking is what this country wants a woman President to look and sound like.  There are no precedents to follow. 

Something most of the candidates are doing that detracts from their credibility is smiling when they deliver scathing attacks on their opponents.  If you were to turn off the sound and watch the candidates during a debate their smiles would make you think it was a pleasant exchange.  In other words, their facial expressions and the content of their messages don’t match.  When a candidate smiles when sticking the knife into an opponent it makes him or her seem disingenuous and smug.  Not traits I want to see in a President.

So remember – if you want to deliver an effective message your verbal and nonverbal behaviors have to match.  Although women are often guilty of delivering serious messages with a smile that undermines their credibility,  men do the same particularly when they’re uncomfortable.  On the other hand, there’s no need to put a stamp on with a steam roller — know when levity is appropriate and will actually enhance your communication. 

TAGS: look and sound of leadership, nonverbal communication, Political debates

Do you really want to know the truth about what it takes to get and keep the job you want?  Can you handle the truth?  It’s not that hard — yet most people miss the mark entirely.  It’s not about doing your job.  Those are just table stakes.  It’s not even about you.  It’s about serving others — putting yourself in the shoes of others and treating them better than you’d want to be treated.  Or as a colleague of mine says, “The Golden Rule is not do unto others as you would have them do unto you, it’s about treating people as they want to be treated.”

What made me want to write about this today is my disgust with the state of customer service in America today.  One thing you can count on, is that most people can’t be counted on to do as they say.  My three year old Maytag dishwasher has been out of commission since Halloween.  I’ve had four different people in to look at it — and none them of have followed through with what they said they were going to do to fix it.  I even wrote to Maytag — and I got a response that included the line, “We apologize that you are experiencing a concern with XXX.”  Yes, XXX was in the e-mail. 

I constantly tell clients and readers that if you really want to distinguish yourself from your colleagues, just do what you say you’re going to do.  Do it with their needs in mind.  The late Robert Greenleaf coined the term “servant leadership.”  He believed that serving others is the most noble action you can take.  I agree.  Not only is it noble, it’s smart.  Serving others isn’t demeaning or only for people lower on the food chain than you think you are.  Doing as you promise and doing it in a way that serves others will distinguish you wherever you go… not to mention making you a pretty darn nice human being to boot.   

TAGS: Customer service, personal brand building, servant leadership

Watching our portfolios slide in value is never fun, and this time around we have the double whammy of knowing our home prices are down as well. I’ve offered some suggestions on my Web site about how to keep from panicking, including turning off the doom-and-gloom commentary and tucking away a bit more cash as a safety net.

Most of the surveys I’ve seen on the topic suggest that women, when they invest, are better investors than men because we trade less often, are less likely to be “overconfident” and more likely to learn from our mistakes. But too many women shun the risk of the stock market because of times like these and deprive themselves of the superior long-term returns only stocks can give.

We shouldn’t let the day-to-day noise of the markets scare us out. If you have an investing plan, stick to it; if you don’t, get one. FinancialEngines.com can help do-it-yourselfers create a retirement portfolio, or you can hire a fee-only planner from NAPFA.org or GarrettPlanningNetwork.com.

TAGS: financial planning, investments, market turmoil, stocks, women and investing

Last night I tuned into the Democratic candidate’s debate about 40 minutes into it.  I was impressed with the performance of all three candidates, particularly Senator Clinton’s.  Whereas Obama pontificated a bit too much for me, and Edwards seemed to rely on passion more than facts, Clinton provided the most detailed responses — and that I liked.  So I was quite surprised when it was over and CNN did its analysis.  I had missed the initial fireworks!  Although one part of me admired Clinton for engaging in offensive action, in the long-run, I felt it was unnecessary and unbecoming.  I realize that she’s following the same strategy that Bill Clinton employed during his campaign (every attack gets a response), but the rules are different for men and women.  Senator Clinton has a unique combination of experience, intelligence, compassion, and vision — all necessary ingredients for leading this country.  In recent months she’s worked on her LQ (likeability quotient) and it’s paying off.  My coaching tip for Mrs. Clinton:  lead with your strengths and stay above the petty politics engaged in by your opponents.   

TAGS: Democratic debate, Hillary

Today I was reading about women being the bigger losers in home foreclosures. The New York Times reported (Jan. 15) that in the Belair-Edison neighborhood of Baltimore more than half of the foreclosures in each of the last four years have been homes owned primarily by women. In 2006, women accounted for 40 percent of home purchases in Baltimore and nearly half of their mortgages were subprime.

“Subprime mortgages are high-cost loans, at least three points above the prime rate, made to borrowers with low income or credit scores. The loans make up just 13 percent of existing home loans but account for 55 percent of foreclosure starts, the Mortgage Bankers Association says.

Though women and men have roughly the same credit scores, the Consumer Federation of America found that women were 32 percent more likely to receive subprime loans than men. The disparity existed within every income and ethnic group. Blacks and Latinos are also more likely to get subprime loans than comparable white borrowers.”

One of the reasons given for this was a disinclination among women to negotiate. Also, the subprime lenders targeted this population.

Now before we assume, however, that this happened because the women weren’t well educated or didn’t have good jobs, consider the following:

“Increased homeownership has been the principal means for women to close this wealth gap. But the disproportion of subprime loans, advocates said, makes it harder for women at all income levels to build wealth by paying off their mortgages.”

“’The striking thing is that the disparity between men and women actually goes up as income rises,’ said Allen J. Fishbein, director of credit and housing policy for the Consumer Federation of America. Among high earners — defined as people earning twice the median income — black women are as much as five times more likely to receive subprime mortgages than white men.”

We women need to ask ourselves what happened here? Liz knows about the financial side and I hope will give us some insights to avoid a repeat of this debacle. Maybe they were being “nice girls” to borrow from Lois — too trusting — or not negotiating at the level required as Carol might tell us. But it wasn’t all them. No doubt the answer is a complex interplay of conditions about which women need to know more.

Shouldn’t we also ask ourselves, too, whether the programs proposed by presidential candidates and the Bush Administration are going to harm these women twice? In other words, are these women, many now struggling to keep their homes, going to get help or is the government simply going to throw money at everyone to get the economy going without extra consideration to those who need help most? Are they going to get the help they need negotiating to keep their mortgages? Some help is already being provided, but for many it’s too little too late.

If you’re in an upcoming primary state and you see a presidential candidate, you might want to ask what they plan to do.

Kathleen

TAGS: government help, subprime loans, wealth, women

 You may have seen the NBC series on the differences between men and women.  One segment: http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21134540/vp/22707660#22710673

provided data that within one year after graduating from college women earned as much as 20% less than men with the same education, background, etc.  So the next time someone asks me, “But don’t you think women have come a long way?” I’m going to tell them, “Obviously not far enough if in 2008 pay disparity still exists.”

TAGS: differences between women and men, Equal pay, Pay Disparity

I’ve just spent the last month recruiting, screening and interviewing for a key position on my staff.  We received over 150 resumes, invited 15 people for interviews, and hired one great person.  In the process I realized how much people don’t know about interviewing — including how to get the interview. Here are some of the biggest mistakes we saw — and how you can avoid them.

• Not following the instructions.  If the ad says supply a letter of interest and resume, then provide exactly that.  Many of our applicants only sent a resume, which told us they couldn’t follow instructions.
• Grammatical and typographical errors.  If there was even one error, we excluded the candidate from consideration.  How hard is it to proof your work or ask a friend to do it for you?
• No show/no call.  Believe it or not, some people who were scheduled for interviews never even showed up or let us know they wouldn’t be coming.  That’s one way to create bad Karma.
• Failure to prepare.  You can count on the fact that you’re going to be asked if you have any questions.  Do a little research on the company and come prepared to ask specific questions based on what you learned.  Exhibit some curiosity. In our office, no questions – no job.
• Lack of follow through.  If I ask a multi-part question, I expect all parts to be answered.  And I when I intentionally interrupt, it’s because I want to see if the candidate can go back and pick up where he or she left off.  If you don’t do these things in the interview, you’ll be less likely to do them on the job.
• Brutal honesty.  If you’re asked for a suggestion on how to improve the company’s website, don’t tell the company President to change her picture to a more recent one.  Find a more neutral and politically correct suggestion. 

TAGS: Interview skills

Take a look at the question posed to Susan Pinker, a columnist for the Globe and Mail (a Canadian daily).  When Susan called to ask me how I would advise the woman,  it made me think of the importance of a strategic introduction. 

When any new leader is named, there will be questions about why he/she got the job.  But when the new leader is a woman, it seems that people are less reluctant to ask their questions out loud – even to the woman herself!  A strategic introduction that makes very clear the skills and experience she has makes all the difference in helping people to get with her program. 

Read the story.

TAGS: Women at Work

captures perfectly how thethinpinkline has impacted Hillary Clinton in the last week. Take a look:

TAGS: Crying at Work, Hillary Clinton, thethinpinkline