Harry Hurt III’s Off The Shelf review in  the business section of the New York Times examines Nina DiSesa’s new book called “Seducing the Boys Club: Uncensored Tactics From a Woman at the Top”.  According to Hurt, DiSensa encourages women to “seduce” and “manipulate” (referred to in the book as “S&M”, catchy enough and all the better to sell books, I guess) men at work and at home. 

It is sad that the same year we have a woman running seriously for President, we are still getting bad advice about how to get ahead.  So here’s some good advice for women who want to position themselves for success in a leadership role:

• Make Sure Key Players Openly Support You

Ask for open and unequivocal support from the people who put you in the job.  After all, their success is tied to your success.

• Tap Into Networks

Establish your own “Advisory Board” comprised of people inside the firm as well as external mentors. Ask politically savvy people to guide you; seek feedback about your performance and the perception of your performance at every opportunity. Renew and strengthen relationships with people in your area of expertise as well as with potential referral sources.

• Hone Your Listening Skills

Figure out what people need (both clients and colleagues) by listening closely. Then help them to get it by offering creative solutions.

When a book as silly as DiSesa’s gets  reviewed by The New York Times (even though it is not a good review) it is a bad thing for women.  Exposure of these “tactics” promulgates mistrust of women – think about the brouhaha about whether or not  Hillary Clinton’s show of emotion was “real”.   Hurt writes that he finds DiSesa’s invocation of “persistent sexual stereotypes” to be depressing; I find it depressing that the book got reviewed at all.

TAGS: Harry Hurt III, Nina DiSesa, stereotypes, The New York Times