At some point, many of us will face the onerous task of emptying out our parents’ or other elderly relatives’ homes–either because they’ve died or they’ve moved into assisted living.

It’s a huge job, and it often falls to women: often the daughters, sometimes the daughters-in-law or, as was recently the case of our family, to the sisters.

Trying to deal with a house packed with stuff is a struggle when your life is already a busy one, with a career, children and a spouse to juggle. At best, it’s a big time drain and a distraction. Add in the emotional trauma, the exhaustion of caring for the elderly relative and perhaps some sibling tension, and you’ve got the recipe for a traumatic experience.

Appraiser Julie Hall says it doesn’t have to be a nightmare, though, and I agree after reading her excellent book, “The Boomer Burden: Dealing with Your Parents’ Lifetime Accumulation of Stuff.” I interviewed her recently and captured some of her best advice for my recent MSN column, “How to get rid of your folks’ stuff.”

She has practical ideas for managing the actual clear-out, but some of her best tips have to do with prevention. If it’s too late to help your folks, help your kids by:

• Decluttering now. If you haven’t used it in a year, get rid of it. Sites like Unclutterer.com can help provide tips and motivation.
• Give away heirlooms while you’re alive to enjoy the reaction.
• Make a master list of who gets what. You need a will, of course, but you won’t necessarily list every item of sentimental or financial value there. Create a master list and get your kids’ input of who wants what, then you make any hard decisions, so they won’t have to.

TAGS: parents, women, Women and Money