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    September 27, 2008

    Lessons Learned from a (Not So Great) Debate

    Filed in: Coaching Tips, Communication Skills, Politics by Dr. Lois Frankel @ 1:53 pm

    Although I don’t think last night’s debate between Obama and McCain will change the minds of undecided voters, it did provide insight into the characters of each man.  In The Thin Pink Line we so often point out what works and what doesn’t work in negotiations, communications, and how you handle your money.  Last night’s debate was about two men walking another kind of thin line (albeit not pink) and provided us with plenty of lessons.  Here’s how I saw it — I’d be curious to know how YOU did.

    • The eyes are the window to the soul.  Did it bother anyone else that McCain stubbornly refused to look at or directly address Obama, even at the moderator’s urging?  If you can’t look an opponent in the eye during a debate, how the heck are you going to handle the delicacies of foreign diplomacy?  In an upcoming post (written before the debate) I talk about the importance of looking people in the eye and actually seeing them, not just looking at them.  Obama’s willingness to do this consistently can be interpreted as a metaphor for how he will “squarely face” the challenges of a President.
    •  Specificity instills confidence.  I hope you noticed how Obama answered most questions using the model I’ve given to you in previous posts: a headline comment of a few sentences then quickly down to numbered key points.  When he said “there are four things I would do…” you listened for those four things and it required him to be on point and specific.  In comparison, McCain was vague and used stories to increase his LQ (likeability quotient).  Stories can be a good tactic for conveying important messages, but you also have to include data and facts to support your position.
    • Embrace change.  McCain referred to Obama’s ideas and strategies for change as “naive.”  Perhaps they are — but if you don’t embrace change then you’re destined to repeat the past.  And as the saying goes, “If you do what you’ve always done, you’ll get what you always got.”  McCain appeared to me as a man stuck in the 20th century with 20th century ideas and practices.  Obama appeared to me as a man with a vision of what could be — although it’s not tried and true.  Success in today’s volatile business environment requires that you at least be on board with change, even if you’re not driving it.
    • Watch the smile.  I tell women this all the time.  Now I’m telling John McCain — the phoney smile  made you look ridiculous.  It clearly was used to cover up contempt and anger. We all are better off when we express our anger in appropriate ways rather than cover it up with absurd forms of body language that others can see through. 
    • Answer questions directly.  Both men get an “F” from this coach in that category.  If you’re asked, “What do you think of the proposed economic stimulus plan?” don’t go off on a tangent about the overall economy and how we got into this mess.  A direct question begs a direct answer.  A response such as, “There are three things I like about it and two things I don’t.  Let me explain.” would have impressed me more than what I heard from the candidates last night. 

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    6 Comments »

    1. Great Blog post. I am going to bookmark and read more often. I love the Blog template

      Comment by Jamie Holts — September 27, 2008 @ 1:58 pm

    2. Lois,
      As always, you hit the nail on the head.

      Comment by Susan Kalmanson — September 27, 2008 @ 8:24 pm

    3. Interesting analogies between negotiation and debate. On the anger point, John McCain suffered unimaginably in service to the rest of us. When his sacrifices are denigrated or ignored by those who never endured such treatment, his anger is understandable. As in this case.

      Comment by Burr Deming — September 27, 2008 @ 8:33 pm

    4. I agree with Burr Deming that John McCain deserves our appreciation for having served our country so selflessly. If the suggestion is that he’s then entitled to be angry and clueless about the ways in which he covers it up with an inappropriate smile and refusal to look his opponent in the eye, then it only further underscores his inability to run the greatest nation on Earth. We need a President who is insightful and introspective as well as decisive, strong, and selfless. That’s what great leaders are made of.

      Comment by Dr. Lois Frankel — September 30, 2008 @ 10:51 am

    5. I found your comment “Perhaps they are — but if you don’t embrace change then you’re destined to repeat the past.” very interesting. I believe the actual phrase is that those who don’t learn from the past are destined to repeat it. Senator McCain has learned a lot from the past that Senator Obama has yet to learn.

      I think an important lesson from this debate which you did not address was the difference in respect that each man showed. While Senator McCain referred to his opponent as “Senator,” Senator Obama chose to refer to his opponent as “John” and the president as “George Bush.” Whether or not you agree with someone’s position or decisions I believe Obama did himself a disfavor by showing so little respect.

      Comment by Cindy — September 30, 2008 @ 12:07 pm

    6. Good points, Cindy. And I did notice that Obama called him John, which I’m sure was designed to minimize the age difference. I’m just curious, though. Do you think that McCain’s unwillingness to look Obama in the eye or address him directly was also a sign of disrespect?

      Comment by Dr. Lois Frankel — September 30, 2008 @ 4:47 pm

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