In the United States the Friday after Thanksgiving is traditionally known to retailers as “Black Friday.” The term originated many years ago when they believed this was the chance to get their sales into “the black.”  With the economy in the doldrums you may be hesitant to shop today — and no one can blame you.  It’s going to be a very different kind of holiday season for many people — not just Americans. Here are a few tips to help you stretch your holiday shopping budget:

1.  Have a budget.   If you start shopping for holiday gifts and you don’t have a budget you will be more likely to spend money you don’t have.  Make a list of what you want for each person on your list and assign a dollar value.  This will help you to make purchasing decisions. 

2.  Spend only cash.  If you’re the kind of person who is disciplined enough to pay off a credit card IN FULL in January, fine.  But otherwise, take the amount of money you think you need to buy the gifts you’re searching for and use only that. 

3.  Forego adult gift giving.  Let’s face it.  Your best friend does not need one more gift to find a place for.  Your sister has her own financial constrictions.  Your parents probably don’t need a thing.  Let them know in advance that you’re going to use your budget to make sure the kids in the family have a nice (maybe not a great) holiday. 

4.  Consider charitable donations in the name of your adult loved ones.  I sent out a letter a few weeks ago telling everyone I typically give a gift to that I believe we are fortunate to have so much in our lives.  Therefore, my gift to them this holiday season is a donation to my nonprofit Bloom Again.  I suggested that they could make a donation to Bloom Again as well or to another charity of their choice.   If you’re donating to a true nonprofit your contribution should also be tax deductible, thereby saving you even more money. 

5.  Accentuate your passions.  I’m an avid photographer and often give gifts of my work.  Because it’s a hobby to me, I take great pleasure in creating cards, pictures, and other gifts that are reflective of my body of work.  Not only does it feed my creativity, it delights others.  Consider ways you can do the same. 

6.  Consider a holiday pot luck.  My family and I know so many people that we can’t possibly get together with them all in December.  So we have an open house pot luck each year.  It lets the people we care most about get to know one another and, in our invitation, we make it clear that all we want each person to bring is a dish to share.   

7.  Remember the reason for the season.  This is the time to live your values.  Whether you are a Christian, Jew, or another denomination, keep in mind what the real meaning of this season is to you and your faith.  Find ways to honor that through participation in religious activities or honoring people who do.

TAGS: Black Friday, Holiday spending

I’m sure I speak for all of us when I say that we are grateful to you for reading The Thin Pink Line and for the fact that you recommend our blog to others.

Happy Thanksgiving to our readers who celebrate it and Happy Thursday to those who don’t!!

Having prepared nearly two dozen Thanksgiving dinners over the years, I can tell you there’s lots to be learned about walking the thin pink line.  And if you’re not American, there are still a few things to be learned about preparing a feast for your loved ones at any time.  Consider these tips:

1.  Don’t do it all alone.  For years I wanted to prove that I was capable of preparing a meal for ten to twenty people… alone.  What a waste of time.  When people ask, “What can I bring?” tell them!  A vegetable casserole, an appetizer plate, dessert or ask them to bring any number of other things that will help you to maintain your sanity.  So what if they’re not quite as tasty as you might make yourself! 

2.  Give up any notion that you can maintain control over your kitchen.  I’ve tried.  It doesn’t work.  When Mom says the turkey needs more basting, let her do it.  When Grandma suggests more salt in the potatoes let her do it.  And when Aunt Sally wants to put a tad more brandy in the egg nog… well, let her do that too.  In the end, it won’t make a smidgeon of difference to anyone else and you’ll save yourself a lot of grief.

3.  Keep the Butterball Hotline number on hand.  Yes, Butterball does have a number you can call if you’re having difficulty with that turkey. 

4.  Assign clean up tasks.  You’ve spent days cooking and cleaning and in about 30 minutes it’s all over.  When people offer to help clean up it’s not the time to pretend you’re Superwoman.  You’re tired!  Let a few people clean the table, a few others load the dishwasher (making sure they don’t put in that good crystal or silverware though), and ask others to help with getting the dessert out.  It doesn’t make you less of a great hostess.

5.  Sit at the head of the table.  This is tricky.  If hubbie and Dad always assume the head positions,  someone is going to be a little bent out of shape.  Your efforts have earned you the head of the table, so take it — even if it means putting little seating assignments on the table.  You’ll be surprised at how powerful it makes you feel!

6.  Serve dinner “fashionably late.”  This was one of my mother’s tricks.  She always said if people came to the table hungry (in her case sometimes they were starving) they would enjoy anything you served!

7.  Fuggedaboud Friday morning sales.  Countless times I’ve gotten up at the crack of dawn to take advantage of the early bird sales on the Friday after Thanksgiving.  In retrospect, sleeping in, spending time with my family, waiting for another sale that will inevitably come before Christmas or Channukah, or getting a massage would have been far more enjoyable.  Unless of course you’re going with a girlfriend, in which case I say… find a spa and enjoy!

Happy Thanksgiving to our American Thin Pink Line bloggers!

TAGS: Butterball Hotline, Women and Thanksgiving

I met with a young woman the other day who was talking about the fact that with the price of gas so high her work-related trips to sites around L.A. was really cutting into her salary.  Raising my eyebrows I said,  ”You mean you aren’t expensing your gas?”  Nope.  She didn’t want to sound greedy by asking for a mileage allowance.  Those of you who have read any of my books or heard me speak know exactly what my response was…. quit bein’ a girl!

A guy would not hesitate to expense his mileage.  Which, by the way, is 58.5 cents per mile according to the IRS. So if you travel 50 miles on company business that’s nearly $30.00 in your pocket.  It may not seem like a lot, but over time it adds up. 

Whether it’s a mileage allowance, reimbursement for taking a client to lunch, picking up donuts every Friday, or the cost of your own meals while away on a business trip, expensing those items back to the company is important for a number of reasons.  First, there’s the obvious — you’re subsidizing your company every time you pay for a legitimate business expense out of your pocket.  Second, if you don’t expense it management will think you’re not particularly savvy about the ways of business economics and less scrupulous employers will take advantage of you.  And third, if money is tight for you, you’ll scrimp on these out-of-pocket expenses and wind up looking less than professional to your customers or clients. 

What’s a nice girl to do?  Here are a few tips:

1.  Find out what the company policy is vis-a-vis out-of-pocket expenses and use it appropriately.

2.  Assume you’re entitled to reimbursement and simply ask the process for expensing it. 

3.  Put an envelope in your purse and use it to keep all receipts for out-of-pocket expenses in one place. 

4.  Whether or not your company gives you a business credit card, have one that you use for only business expenses.  This keeps a clean and clear record. 

5.  Let go of the notion that asking to be reimbursed for legitimate business expenses is greedy.  It’s not.  It’s just good business sense.

TAGS: company credit card, mileage allowance, Out-of-pocket business expenses, reimbursement for business expenses

Do you believe that “a formal appearance on the job is important for career success”?

If you do, you are in the majority; And, if you’re between 21 and 29 years old, you are part of a generation of workers who believes it more than other age groups.

Source: Millennials At Work: Myths vs. Reality., March 2008, by JWT, a New York based advertising agency

I’m not sure how to reconcile this statistic with the clothing choices I often see young women making though. After all, as the old adage goes, dress for the job you want, not the job you have.

Some ideas about how to do this even if you aren’t prepared to spring for a whole new wardrobe:

• Look around your company. What are the executive women wearing? Take note, you can use this data to inform your own choices even if you are a lot younger and make considerably less money than they do.

• Ask a friend whose look you admire to sort through your closet with you. Follow his/her advice about what not to wear!

• Invest in a couple of neutral colored jackets you can wear with lots of different outfits. Jackets signal authority and will make you feel more powerful.

• Your shoes or boots don’t have to be Christian Louboutin’s but they do have to be clean, polished and well-heeled. Locate and frequent your local shoe repair shop.

• Ditto for your bag. Buy (or solicit as a gift) a serious bag to use for work.

People form an impressions of you in the first 30 seconds Make sure the impression they form serves your career interests well.

TAGS: career wardrobe, clothing, dressing for work

I’ve talked before about the importance of taking the high road — even when you don’t want to or can’t see the immediate benefit.  As we see more and more companies laying people off you might just find yourself facing an HR representative handing you a termination notice.  This happened today to a client who called and asked for advice about how to handle a number of aspects of her separation from a company at which she worked for over 20 years. 

During our first phone call she was in shock.  I explained that the loss of a job (especially one where you’ve worked for many years and have many close friends and colleagues) follows the same pattern of emotions as the loss of a loved one: denial, anger, bargaining depression, acceptance. I reminded her that she had many skills that would valuable elsewhere but focusing on the next job right now might not be quite as important as dealing with her feelings and giving herself time to grieve.  With a hefty separation package she had a financial cushion to help her get through it. 

Then came the second call a few hours later.  She’d been talking to others who were laid off today also and collectively they’d worked themselves into quite an angry state.  I laughed and said she’d reached the second phase of loss quicker than I thought she would.  Others were saying there was no reason to go back to work for their last day tomorrow since they were terminated today and they should let the employer fend for itself.  The separation papers had today’s date and they believed they would not be paid for tomorrow anyway. 

I told her my advice would be to take the high road and go to work but let HR know that she was doing this with the assumption she would not be paid.  The woman was somewhat resistant, suggesting that I was being a pushover and why should she work for nothing.  Once again I emphasized that you never slam a door on your way out and since in our first conversation she said she wanted to do freelance work for the company in the future, management would judge her by her actions in this situation.

She copied me on an e-mail she sent to HR explaining that even though it appeared she would not be paid for tomorrow she would be in as usual because after 20 years it was the professional thing to do.  In it she asked that she be considered for freelance opportunities that might arise.  In short, she took the high road.  And you know what… HR wrote back assuring her that she would indeed be paid for her last day and that the separation papers would be changed to reflect this.  In addition, they applauded her professionalism under difficult circumstances and promised to keep her in mind for those freelance jobs. 

Whether or not she’s ever contacted for freelance work isn’t really the point.  In the face of this devastating loss for her (she described her department as a “family” she would miss) she acted with integrity and that is something she’ll never regret.  While her colleagues are on that crowded “low road” she’ll be able to look herself in the mirror.  And I have a hunch good things will come to her in return.

TAGS: Handling layoffs, integrity, taking the high road

Even though the job market is ugly, don’t sell yourself short. Marty Orgel made the point recently in The Wall Street Journal that answering the inevitable interview question about salary requirements is tougher than ever. Marty recommended the same salary sites that you read about here right at The Thin Pink Line back in July, 2008.

TAGS: benchmarking salary, compensation. gender wage gap, salary sites

Too many women think if they don’t carry the title of manager or supervisor they can’t influence those around them.  Nothing is further from the truth.  I’m sure you know managers who rely on their position power to get people to do what they want.  The problem is that they get subversive compliance – people who do actually what they’re asked and nothing more.  True influence comes from the ability to make your case using data, facts, and figures regardless of your level, age, or experience.  If you’re the kind of person who says things like, “I recommend this because my instinct tells me it’s the right thing to do”  you’re going to have to make a shift toward facts that support your instinct.  It’s not that your instinct isn’t right, it’s that decision-makers want to know why and how you came to the conclusion you did.  The next time you make a proposal or want to influence the direction of a project try doing these three things:

1.  Research best practices.  Find out what your competitors and others are doing that contribute to their success.  You can get this information through professional associations, interviews with network contacts, and the internet. 

2.  Translate your idea into dollars and cents.  Whenever possible provide data that projects how much money will be made or saved by implementing your idea.  This will demonstrate your commitment to improving the bottom-line.

3.  Build support for your idea before presenting it.  Here’s where you can demonstrate your political savvy.  Get input from key players (especially decision-makers) and fine-tune your concept so that when it is presented these people already feel educated about it and have some stake in the outcome.  Especially if you’re proposing a new product or path, people need time to get used to the idea so giving them advance notice will increase receptivity when presented formally.

TAGS: influence skills, Political skills

This arrived in my in-box indicating it was an actual letter from an Austin woman sent to Procter and Gamble regarding their feminine products.  She really gets rolling after the first paragraph. It’s PC Magazine’s 2007 editors’ choice for best webmail-award-winning letter. Whether it’s real or a hoax it’s something to which I know many Thin Pink Line bloggers will relate. 

 Dear Mr. Thatcher,

 I have been a loyal user of your ‘Always’ maxipads for over 20 years and I appreciate many of their features. Why, without the LeakGuard Core or Dri-Weave absorbency, I’d probably never go horseback riding or salsa dancing, and I’d certainly steer clear of running up and down the beach in tight, white shorts.  But my favorite feature has to be your revolutionary Flexi-Wings.  Kudos on being the only company smart enough to
realize how crucial it is that maxi pads be aerodynamic. I can’t tell you how safe and secure I feel each month knowing there’s a little F-16 in my pants.

Have you ever had a menstrual period, Mr. Thatcher? I’m guessing you haven’t. Well, my time of the month is starting right now. As I type, I can already feel hormonal forces violently surging through my body. Just a few minutes from now, my body will adjust and I’ll be transformed into what my husband likes to call ‘an inbred hillbilly with knife skills.’ Isn’t the human body amazing?

As Brand Manager in the Feminine-Hygiene Division, you’ve no doubt seen quite a bit of research on what exactly happens during your customer’s monthly visits from ‘Aunt Flo’. Therefore, you must know about the bloating, puffiness, and cramping we endure, and about our intense mood swings, crying jags, and out-of-control behavior. You surely realize it’s a tough time for most women.

Last month, while in the throes of cramping so painful I wanted to reach inside my body and yank out my uterus, I opened an Always maxi-pad, and there, printed on the adhesive backing, were these words: ‘Have a Happy Period.’    Are you f—— kidding me?

For the love of God, pull your head out, man! If you have to slap a moronic message on a maxi pad, wouldn’t it make more sense to say something that’s actually pertinent, like ‘Put down the Hammer’ or ‘Vehicular Manslaughter is Wrong’,

Sir, please inform your Accounting Department that, effective immediately, there will be an $8 drop in monthly profits, for I have chosen to take my maxi-pad business elsewhere. And though I will certainly miss your Flex-Wings, I will not for one minute miss your brand of condescending bullcrap.

Live your life in such a way that when your feet hit the floor in the morning, Satan shudders & says… ‘Oh crap….she’s awake!!’

TAGS: Procter Gamble, women's hygiene

Paige Churchman wrote about the “Top Women” lists recently published by Fortune and Forbes in a blog post at theglasshammer.com. She noted that the lists are dissimilar both in the names they include and the compensation numbers they report explaining that these lists are “both art and science.”

While we all may not be inclined to “cry a river” for Meg Whitman (who, as Churchman points out, either made $120.4 million according to Forbes or only $11.9 million according to Fortune), we should be concerned about the persistent gender wage gap even for those women who are household names.  When they are underpaid relative to their male colleauges or counterparts, it hurts all of us.

Churchman writes:

The national average for women in all professions is nearly 78 cents to the dollar of men. That’s the closest women have ever come to matching the male dollar. It’s up from 77 cents last year and 74 cents ten years ago, a far sight better than in the sixties and seventies when the number had a tough time breaking 59 cents. (Women’s Earnings as a Percentage of Men’s, 1951-2007) Even with her one-time million-dollar package, Ms. Whitman makes not quite 63 cents to the highest-paid male executive’s dollar. (The top-paid male executive was Oracle’s Larry Ellison, who made $193 million in 2007.)…Forbes’s top ten men made no less than $72 million, compared with its top ten women’s $12 million─17 to 20 cents to the dollar of the top ten men.

She then cites several reasons for the gender wage gap offered by various reseachers. Although the explanations are myriad (and some clearly ridiculous) they are worth reading.   While the gender wage gap is completely outside of our control on a macro basis, it’s good to remember that we need to pay attention to our compensation packages on an individual basis. More thoughts about this in a post to appear on Thursday.

TAGS: compensation. gender wage gap, economic power, Forbes, Fortune, Meg Whitman, Top Women in Business