Maureen Dowd’s NY Times column on Sunday veered away from her usual wickedly withering political commentary - instead, she interviewed Father Pat O’Connor, a 79 year old Catholic priest about how to recognize a potentially problematic husband before you marry him.
It occurred to me how much of Father O’Connor’s sage advice applied to making a decision about whether to take a new job. He notes that it is important for young people to hear his thoughts before they fall seriously in love because once they fall in love, it’s too late. “Infatuation trumps judgment.” So too for job seekers - do your due diligence before you get seduced by the job title, the money or the career possibilities it might lead to - by then, you’re too emotionally invested. (more…)
TAGS: career change, career derailment, careers, Job Search, Marriage, Maureen Dowd
A friend sent me an article, Why Are So Many Women Depressed, by Dennis Prager. She wanted to know what I thought of it. My first thought was why would anyone with half a brain put his name to this absurd nonsense. The net-net of the piece is that feminism unrealistically raised the expectations of women and failed to deliver. Hence, feminism is at the core of a high incidence of depression among women. Prager then has the audacity to claim, “ For most women — of course, not all — careers are not nearly as fulfilling as are a good marriage and family.” Dennis… from where did you pull these numbers? Or, to paraphrase Jerry Maquire, “Show me the study.” Psychologist Anna Freud had it right when she said, “It’s the good, capable, conscientious woman who is more likely to be depressed than her counterparts.” Maybe if we lived in a society where women weren’t forced to choose between a career and family they wouldn’t be so depressed. Maybe if the full range of a woman’s capabilities were acknowledged and utilized without her having to dumb down so as not to offend male bosses, colleagues, brothers, or husbands women wouldn’t be so depressed. And maybe — just maybe — if people like Dennis Prager spent less time focusing on what’s wrong with women and more time focused on what’s right with them despite the choices they make, women wouldn’t be so depressed. Now you know what I think about the article. What do YOU think?
TAGS: Dennis Prager, Feminism, women and careers, Women and Depression, women and families
To listen to the spin the media is putting on it, Silda Spitzer is one weak sister for standing by her cheating husband, Eliot. The pundits were out in mass today asking how any woman with an ounce of self-respect could put up with a philandering husband — even going so far as to suggest money, power, or security must be at the core of such a decision. You know, one of the things I like about women is that we don’t desert people at the first hint of scandal or problems in the relationship whether that relationship is marriage, friendship, or familial. Unlike many men who bolt or stray when the wife becomes terminally ill, a child is born with a disability, or the wife (God forbid) gains weight, women are loyal — at times to a fault. I’m not saying Ms. Spitzer should stay with the governor — nor am I saying she should leave. All I’m saying is that women who provide support to others when they need it most, then make longer-term decisions later after much thought, deliberation, fact-finding or counseling, should be lauded not ridiculed. They are wonderful examples to their daughters (and sons) for how to handle relationship crises. Let those among us who are without sin cast the first stone.
TAGS: Eliot Spitzer, loyalty, Silda Spitzer, stand by your man, women role models