My friend Susan Picascia and I wrote an article that appeared in the June issue of Hemisphere’s magazine entitled “Creating a Workplace Legacy.”  Our premise is that wherever you land about five years before you plan to retire is most likely where you’re going to remain.  Companies often marginalize employees in what we call the “final five” (particularly women!) but you can revitalize your career by thinking about the legacy you want to leave behind.  If you’re interested in seeing the entire article, e-mail me at info@drloisfrankel.com, but here are few tips for how you can remain productive and fulfilled during the last few years of employment:

• Take more risks.  At this stage of your career you have little to lose.  You’ve proven yourself, you have experience, and you can make a difference.  Be the voice of dissent when it’s clear the company is headed in a potentially disasterous direction or say the things everyone else is thinking but are afraid to say.
• Create new systems or processes.   You’ve been so busy doing your entire career you may have never taken the time to step back and see how things could be done more efficiently or cost effectively.   Now’s your chance to leave a lasting legacy based on your unique expertise and experience.
• Influence the vision, values, and goals of your company.  Seize opportunities to illuminate how the company can be a better member of the community, treat its staff better, or raise the bar for how business in your industry is done.  Comments like “I like this new idea.  Let’s think about how it will impact our community” or “If we really want to retain talent let’s look at the developmental opportunities we provide to all employees, not just ones we hand pick” can go a long way toward leaving a legacy of which you can be proud.

TAGS: making a difference, retirement, Women and Aging, workplace legacy

At some point, many of us will face the onerous task of emptying out our parents’ or other elderly relatives’ homes–either because they’ve died or they’ve moved into assisted living.

It’s a huge job, and it often falls to women: often the daughters, sometimes the daughters-in-law or, as was recently the case of our family, to the sisters.

Trying to deal with a house packed with stuff is a struggle when your life is already a busy one, with a career, children and a spouse to juggle. At best, it’s a big time drain and a distraction. Add in the emotional trauma, the exhaustion of caring for the elderly relative and perhaps some sibling tension, and you’ve got the recipe for a traumatic experience.

Appraiser Julie Hall says it doesn’t have to be a nightmare, though, and I agree after reading her excellent book, “The Boomer Burden: Dealing with Your Parents’ Lifetime Accumulation of Stuff.” I interviewed her recently and captured some of her best advice for my recent MSN column, “How to get rid of your folks’ stuff.”

She has practical ideas for managing the actual clear-out, but some of her best tips have to do with prevention. If it’s too late to help your folks, help your kids by:

• Decluttering now. If you haven’t used it in a year, get rid of it. Sites like Unclutterer.com can help provide tips and motivation.
• Give away heirlooms while you’re alive to enjoy the reaction.
• Make a master list of who gets what. You need a will, of course, but you won’t necessarily list every item of sentimental or financial value there. Create a master list and get your kids’ input of who wants what, then you make any hard decisions, so they won’t have to.

TAGS: parents, women, Women and Money

I was never a fan of Sex in the City, but based on box office revenues this past week-end a lot of women are.  Apparently Lauren Hutton is not one of them.  The morning DJ on my local oldies radio station, KRTH, said Hutton “lost it” on the Today Show so I decided to find out what that was all about. You can watch the segment by clicking here and decide for yourself.  Personally, I think she has strong feelings but wouldn’t say she lost it.  It’s a little like saying Hillary had a melt down in New Hampshire.  Why is it when a woman expresses strong feelings men can’t handle it?  If you really listen to Hutton, there are kernels of truth in what she says.  Is Sex and the City a realistic representation of women’s lives in 2008?  Is it purely entertainment?  Is it encouragement to women who are 40 + ? Or, as Hutton suggests, is it a manifestation of how men view women?  It’s your call. 

TAGS: Lauren Hutton, Sex in the City, The Today Show, women and anger

Tonight I received an e-mail from my dear friend Itje Suryono from Jakarta, Indonesia.  I had not heard from her in a while and was worried.  I wrote to several mutual friends in Jakarta inquiring into her well-being and finally she responded.  We started off as client/consultant and soon realized we were kindred spirits.  I’ve known Itje for over 20 years and have learned so much from her.  Most of all I’ve learned that around the world we women are so much more similar than we are different. In tonight’s e-mail she apologized for not writing but that she “was getting old.”  How many of us feel the exact same way?  There is so much to do and so little time that we just get tuckered out.  Over the years I learned from Itje that we may worship different entities and speak different languages but at the heart of it all we want the best for our families, wish we had more time for our friends, and suffer the eccentricities of our bosses and husbands.  I wish more women within other countries understood this notion.  We look different, but feel the same.  We share the same concerns.  We struggle with the same challenges.  You don’t have to go half way around the world to figure this out.  I invite our international visitors to talk about their challenges so that we may all learn from — and help one another — to be even better than we already are.

TAGS: global issues, international women's issues, Jakarta, Women In the Professions, women's challenges

I come from a long line of women who hold their tongues – except for saying “just one thing.”  I recall my mother telling me how she thought so and so was doing things all wrong but, “I held my tongue” she would proudly say.  Then a little later in the conversation I would find out she did say “just one thing” about it to so and so.  It seems when the women in my family say “just one thing” this counts as saying nothing.  The adult women in our family range in age from 30 - 87 and I see it across all ages, so I’m afraid it’s a genetic thing passed unknowingly from generation to generation.  I thought I was the lucky one who the gene skipped over… until I said “just one thing” the other day.  As my business partner and I left a luncheon she asked why I was so tough on one of our colleagues.  ”Tough?  I held my tongue!” I replied indignantly.  “I said just one thing about the project she was supposed to have finished by now.”  And it was then that I realized I wasn’t so lucky after all.  That gene didn’t pass me over.  It was lying dormant all these years, waiting to emerge triumphantly to prove I had Levenson blood running through my veins.  I had become my mother.     

TAGS: holding your tongue, mothers and daughters

Not too long ago my ten year old niece asked me how old I was.  When I told her I was 56 she said, “Wow.  I didn’t know you were that old.”  I’m not sharing this because I think I look younger — my niece doesn’t have a clue what 56 looks like.  She was responding to how I play with her, talk to her about things that interest her - not me, and the energy I exhibit when we do things together.

Then I watched an interview with Bette Midler talking about her new Las Vegas show called “The Show Girl Girl Must Go On.” She said she named it that because no matter your age (and she’s 62) you’ve got to do what you love to do.  Cher, who also turns 62 this year, is another example of someone who, after performing her “farewell tour” a number of years ago, is now planning to appear in a regular Las Vegas show as well.  And then there’s Tina Turner who turned in a rousing performance at the Grammy’s that makes it impossible to believe she’s 68.

The point here is — don’t let your age stop you from doing what you most love or feel compelled to do.  We don’t stop wanting to achieve, create, and live life to the fullest because we’re older.  The human need to grow and learn is a life long process.  These women entertainers provide us with wonderful role models for not “going qently into that good night.”  There was a time when Hollywood ignored anyone over 35 — these women are changing those rules.  And if Hollywood can change the rules, so can you.

TAGS: aging gracefully, Bette Midler, Cher, life long learning, Tina Turner