Yesterday I attended a session called “Flexing the Workplace: New Ways to Get Work Done and Build Careers” spearheaded by Deborah Epstein Henry of Flex-time Lawyers and sponsored by the National Association of Women Lawyers.
As you can probably guess from the title, the speakers discussed both research and recommendations for the ways that law firms can adapt and change to meet the demands of both men and women who don’t want to do things in the same way that they’ve always been done.
The issues are complicated. And to make it even more challenging, law firms are culturally steeped in precedent and tradition so that change can be very painful. Patricia Gillette, co-founder of the Opt In Project and a wonderful speaker, quoted Carly Fiorina: “Change is like heaven; everyone wants to go there but nobody wants to die.” So policies that allow for flexible work schedules don’t come easy.
But even if you work in a company that has managed to establish such policies, they don’t help unless you can actually use them without damaging your career. The senior leadership in your firm has undoubtedly supported these policies because they make smart business sense. But those below in the pecking order may not have the “big picture” in mind - these “frozen middle” people can make actually using flexible work policies difficult if not impossible.
That’s where negotiation comes in - it’s the way you can melt the ice. Three tips:
- Be prepared.
The conversation you will have with your manager should help him or her to wholeheartedly support your decision. You have to be very clear about how you will continue to meet business objectives under the new arrangement.
- Be aware.
Think about how your decision will affect your colleagues. Will anyone be disaffected? If so, how can you proactively manage the situation before resentment starts to fester?
- Be firm.
While an occasional emergency may require that you respond immediately, think about how you can manage things so that the flexible schedule that you have designed doesn’t get eroded.
TAGS: Building workplace relationships, career derailment, Fairness at work, flexibility, Negotiation, negotiation skills, The National Association of Women Lawyers, The Opt In Project, Women In the Professions, work life balance
I’ve often thought it odd that people seem to be more reluctant to talk about their income than their sex lives-but that may be changing. The NY Times reported yesterday that young people are more likely to share information about salary information (see Not-So-Personal Finance). This trend is good news for women; the more women know about what others are making, the more likely they are to ask for what they are worth.
As you may know, the gender gap in pay affects not only older women but younger women as well. For example, starting salaries of men with MBAs are 7.6% higher than those for women. Only 7% of women, but 57% of men asked for more money; those who negotiated increased starting salaries by 7.4%.
One of the things that makes the difference for women is good information. So, keep up the sharing!
TAGS: differences between women and men, Fairness at work, financial planning, gaining confidence, negotiating pay, negotiation skills, Pay Disparity, Women at Work, women's equality
Have you been bullied at work? If so, you’re not alone.
Tara Parker-Pope reported in her NY Times column last week that 37% of Americans have been bullied on the job. Her blog, Well, offered a quiz to help you figure out whether you were a victim of bullying.
It was fairly obvious that you have been bullied if you answer “yes” to some of the questions, for example, “Been yelled at or shouted at in a hostile manner?” Others were more subtle, “Been given little or no feedback about your performance?”
As I read the comments, it became clear that many people ignore bullies because they don’t know how to respond to them. Or at least what to say out loud…But if you don’t deal with them, of course, they don’t stop - they get worse.
Kathleen offered some terrific advice the other day about how to play hardball including some “comebacks” from her books, The Secret Handshake and It’s All Politics.
Here are some other ideas:
- Enlist allies. Find others who have also been bullied by the same person and collaborate to plan a strategy about how to respond. It’s always easier to confront a bully when you have support.
- Figure out what leverage you may have - is there any action that you can take that will scare the bully into behaving better? For example, if he/she is stupid enough to leave an email trail, save the emails (if you think that nobody is that stupid, consider Eliot Spitzer). Then you can let him/her know that you have documentation that puts him/her/the company at risk. Note well: don’t back a bully into a corner unless you have proof and are willing to use it.
- If you don’t think you can prove the bullying behavior and are convinced that the bully is there to stay, plan your exit strategy. Don’t wait. If you do, you will be too exhausted and demoralized to put your best foot forward for another position.
TAGS: Building workplace relationships, career derailment, Fairness at work, gaining confidence, health issues at work, Leaving a bad boss or a job you hate
Let’s take another lesson from Hillary Clinton’s campaign. It is beginning to remind me of when I used to think that fairness counts to everyone. Nothing could be further from the truth. I’ve frequently heard women, including myself when I was younger, arguing that an action taken in hiring, firing, denying a promotion or promoting someone wasn’t fair. After all, another individual was more experienced or had worked harder. Having studied persuasion at length, even back then, I should have known that just because fairness matters in many walks of life, doesn’t mean it matters at work to people making the decisions. They may care more about how well a person “fits” or whether he or she is likely to facilitate their goals.
Hillary Clinton has been emphasizing her experience because it should matter. But clearly it doesn’t matter to a lot of people right now. They just want a change. And to them experience is too closely allied to doing things the old way. Like it or not, this is what has happened. And it has taken her by surprise.
An important lesson for everyone is here, but especially for women who tend to think that arguments about fundamental values should win out over less substantial ones. What matters varies across organizations and over time. We’ve seen in George W. Bush’s administration an overriding emphasis on loyalty. Perhaps that is the case where you work.
The lesson: Never assume that just because a standard of evaluating worth should matter where you work that it actually does. Find out what matters. Then perhaps you’ll be able to argue in their language and link what you do to what they care about. Otherwise, they’ll simply tune you out.
TAGS: Fairness at work, Hillary Clinton's experience lesson, loyalty at work, speaking their language
