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    June 4, 2008

    An Open Letter to Hillary

    Filed in: Coaching Tips, Leadership, Politics, The Thin Pink Line Examples by Dr. Lois Frankel @ 5:38 am

    Dear Hillary:

    I hope you won’t find it too familiar to call you by your first name.  Studying you over the past year or so has caused me to feel as if I know you personally - so much more so than after you spent 8 years in the White House as First Lady.  I think that was your intention - to allow Americans to see who you are, not only what you stand for.  Once you opened yourself up to us, we opened our hearts to you.  What a wonderful leadership lesson for both men and women - vulnerability is not a liability but an asset. 

    Thank you, Hillary, for the dedication you demonstrated to securing the Democratic nomination for President of the United States.  Do I agree with your stance on all of the issues?  No.  But do I respect and admire you for your selfless dedication to public service and your willingness to put yourself on the line, open to criticism, day after day, month after month?  You bet.  I don’t know how many of us would be willing to show the same courage under fire. 

    You showed us in real-time what it means to walk The Thin Pink Line.  Moms, entrepreneurs, business professionals, volunteers, and even authors have learned invaluable lessons in a new brand of feminine leadership from how you handled yourself (and others) during the campaign.  Some of those lessons come from the myriad things you did right — others come from what you could have done differently.  Here’s what I know I will take away from your campaign — and what I hope other women will as well.

    1.  We can be strong leaders without losing one ounce of our femininity.  You delivered tough messages fairly and kindly.  You played the game like a woman without playing the gender card.   

    2.  We don’t have to acquiesce to louder male voices asking us to relinquish our goals.  By adhering to your vision to compete until every vote was cast and every voice was heard you persevered despite calls to step down.  

    3.  Leaders have not only the right, but the responsibility to exhibit their emotions.  Masculine leadership is stoic.  Feminine leadership is genuine.  You showed us that in New Hampshire.

    4.  Loyalty can be misplaced.  Like many women, you were loyal to those who showed loyalty to you — even when they  may not have been the best people for the job.  To best serve others, leaders must surround themselves with those who best serve them.  Tough decisions are best made sooner than later. 

    5.  Focus on facts, not personalities.  You were at your best when you exhibited your command of the issues and concern for the American public, not reacting to the bait put out by opponents or critics.  Bill’s campaign strategy to counterattack doesn’t work for women leaders.   

    6.  Fight fair, fight clean, but fight.  You waged an aggressive, but civilized, campaign.  You showed us that women can (and should) compete to win without going for the jugular. 

    7.  Developing a leadership persona takes practice.  Over the course of the campaign the strident, tense Hillary was replaced by a woman with great confidence and ease in front of cameras and crowds.  As a professor once told me, “You demonstrate the self-confidence that comes with repetition.”

    Again, thank you, Hillary.  You’ve represented all women, indeed all Americans, well.  You’ve changed the tone of political campaigns from animosity to even-handed competition.  You leave a legacy from which we can all learn and apply to our daily lives.  We look forward to learning even more from you in the years to come.

    With gratitude and admiration,

    Dr. Lois Frankel

     

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    April 21, 2008

    Women Advancing Women

    Filed in: Characteristics of women, Communication Skills by Dr. Kathleen Kelley Reardon @ 12:15 pm

    I attended The White House Project EPIC Awards last Thursday held at The American Museum of Natural History in New York. We were all seated beneath the huge blue whale that hangs from the ceiling. It was a celebration of 10 years The White House Project has devoted to enhancing women’s progress in a wide variety of fields. As their website indicates, this job is far from over. There have been a lot of derogatory remarks made about "old feminists" lately because Hillary Clinton is in the race for President. But, truth be told, none of us makes it to the top of our fields alone. We all need help. And we all stand on the shoulders of giants. So the next time you read or hear someone disparaging women who’ve stuck their necks out, like the tall tree that catches the wind, trying to advance women’s options, tell them that. We need each other. That doesn’t preclude helping men. It just means we should all consider from time to time what we’ve contributed lately to helping women reach higher levels of business, government, and other fields dominated by men. And getting there is only part of the battle. Staying there requires help from other women too. We’re a long way from both goals and we need each other.

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    March 28, 2008

    Nice Guys Don’t Get the Corner Office Either

    Filed in: Leadership, Women In the Professions by Dr. Lois Frankel @ 8:48 pm

    At least not if you’re working for Donald Trump.  Piers Morgan’s victory over Trace Adkins as the winner of the Celebrity Apprentice contest shouldn’t be confused with true leadership.  I know leadership and Piers, you’re no leader.  Yes, he made a lot of money… but plenty of people do the same and they’re not leaders.  They’re lone rangers.  Others don’t want to work with them.  They demean and dispirit the very people who depend on them and who they depend on for success.  Their style works in the short-term but they fail to get long-term trust, cooperation, and commitment.  If you’re thinking you might be too nice for the corner office I don’t recommend that you follow Piers’ lead — the advice Carol and Kathleen gave you in this week’s posts is far sounder – and you can still look yourself in the mirror. 

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    March 27, 2008

    Being Able to “Do Hardball” Is More Important Than Doing It

    Filed in: Characteristics of women, Communication Skills by Dr. Kathleen Kelley Reardon @ 9:31 pm

    Carol’s insights about leadership led me to think about this topic. As Carol explains, there are a variety of leadership forms and each is more or less suited to particular types of situations. None works for all. But I learned as a youngish woman that having an edge and people knowing you can employ it is very useful.  Most of the time, being able to “do hardball,” as the title above implies, is more important and more useful than doing it. There is something to be said for keeping unsavory people a little unsure of you, not quite able to predict if you will counter in kind or cleverly an insult or offense. They tread somewhat lighter, watch what they say a little bit more carefully. And that can pay big political and professional dividends.

    I devoted a fair amount of space in The Secret Handshake and It’s All Politics to examples of comebacks — ways of asserting yourself and advancing your ideas in the face of opposition. Some are graceful, others clever, still others direct and some aggressive. Versatility is key, especially if you work in a highly political environment. Knowing how to lead without being commanding is critical to success. Knowing how to hit back when it really counts is too.

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